1-Sentence-Summary: The Way Of Integrity uses science, spirituality, humor, and Dante’s Divine Comedy to teach you how to find well-being, healing, a sense of purpose, and much more by rediscovering integrity, or the recently lost art of living true to yourself by what you do, think and say.
Read in: 4 minutes
Favorite quote from the author:
Sometimes in life, we get stuck in poor habits that make us lose touch with ourselves. Maybe you’re in a bad relationship, or you can’t shake your habit of constant people-pleasing. You might be wondering how to feel like you again.
If this is you, don’t worry because there is a way to restore who you really are: integrity. In Martha Beck’s The Way of Integrity: Finding the Path to Your True Self, Beck reveals the cure for psychological suffering is to start being true to yourself again by having integrity.
Drawing upon inspiration from Dante’s The Divine Comedy, she presents a four-step process through Dante’s metaphorical world that will help you find integrity again. She promises that I’m doing so, you will develop a newfound sense of purpose, healing and finally end your emotional suffering.
Here’s the book summarized in just 3 lessons:
- Integrity is the true cure for emotional suffering.
- You can free yourself from the Dark Wood of Error by acknowledging you’re lost and get through the Inferno by letting go of what is causing your suffering.
- Pass through Purgatory by living your new truth, and soon you will find Paradise.
Ready to discover The Way of Integrity and find your true self? Let’s go!
Lesson 1: The only true antidote for your emotional suffering is living with integrity.
Think for a minute about your life. Are you working at a subpar job only to pay the bills? Are you in a relationship that’s stagnant? Maybe you realize your life isn’t exactly how you would’ve wanted it. But you’re fine, right?
Now look deep inside and think about how your life makes you feel. You might say you’re fine, but is fine really what you want for the rest of your life?
The author says if you relate to this at all, the cure is integrity. Nowadays, integrity has taken a somewhat different meaning than what it originally meant, which is to be whole or intact. For example, a plane with integrity will fly smoothly through the air because all the parts work properly and simultaneously. Losing its integrity could mean it crashes.
Life is the same. We put off how we really feel or what we really want to live up to social standards, so we end up tired, unhappy, and even sick. When we do things that don’t align with who we really are, we suffer because we get out of sync with ourselves.
On the flip side, when you are aligned mentally, physically, and spiritually, your work will absorb you. As a result, you will enjoy being around other people, sleep better, and be excited to start the day. So if you’re ready to start being who you really are and live a fuller life, you’re ready to take a walk through Dante’s world.
Lesson 2: Get through the Dark Wood by acknowledging you are lost and survive the Inferno by letting go of things that bring you suffering.
On his path, Dante first finds himself in the Dark Wood of Error. On your path to integrity, this is where you start. You feel alone, and you don’t know how you got to where you are. We feel this inner fog because we live with a dichotomy.
The first step to emerge from the woods is to finally acknowledge you’re lost. Doing this will likely present you with challenges like the sorrowful wolf (depression), the terrifying lion (panic), and the ravenous leopard (neediness).
To move forward, find a teacher. You might find yours through therapy or even yoga. Also, learn how to listen to your most important teacher—your inner self. Start doing this by focusing on your present.
Soon you’ll enter the Inferno. This is the hellish place where sinners live out punishments. Each one of us has an inferno inside that happens when we aren’t true to ourselves.
Dante’s teacher, Virgil, tells him to observe the demons, question them, and move on. For us, that means to determine what beliefs are bringing us suffering and asking ourselves whether or not it’s true. If you realize it’s not, let go of it. Letting go of false beliefs can be hard and scary.
To leave, you have to go to the center of the inferno, which contains a frozen lake full of liars. Dante compares lying to being frozen in ice. When you lie to yourself, you become numb and lonely.
At the center of the lake is Lucifer, and Dante has to climb down him to leave. The only way we can move on is by realizing there is a core lie at the center of everything — that you’re alone. At some point, the deeper you dive into your suffering, you’ll stop going down and start rising. You will begin to accept you are both worthy and loved.
Lesson 3: Pass through Purgatory by matching your behaviors and your inner truth, and once these completely align, you are in Paradise.
Once Dante exits the Inferno, he finds himself at the base of a giant mountain. This is Purgatory. Purgatory is where people who are repentant work their way to heaven by performing various tasks. By now, your new way of thinking should help your suffering, but it’s time to align your thoughts with your actions.
It’s also time to stop looking back and fully commit to your truth. This means living with integrity both through your thoughts and your actions. This could mean that you stop laughing when your coworker tells an inappropriate joke. It will be a big change, so give yourself space to mourn your old life if you need to.
You can now feel what you really feel, say what you’ve always wanted to say, and do what you really want to do. The more you do these new things, the more they will become habits. It doesn’t have to be all at once, but each time you do more of the things you love and let go of the things you don’t, you will come closer to aligning your inner integrity.
Near the end of Purgatory, Dante is dunked in two rivers, one that makes him forget what he’s done wrong and another that reminds him of the things he’s done right. Once he rises out of the water, he’s in total integrity. At this point, he glides up effortlessly to Paradise.
You can also metaphorically do this by reclaiming your innocence and finding your own personal inner paradise. Your first step is to forgive yourself for the times you betrayed your integrity. The next step is to value the things you’ve done in the past that supported who you really are. The more you do this, the more you will make integrity and compassion a permanent part of your life, meaning you are wired for happiness.
The Way Of Integrity Review
Whoa, what a mind-blowing book! The Way Of Integrity is an amazing metaphor for living true to yourself, and I couldn’t be happier that I discovered it. There were so many cool lessons the author pulled out by using The Divine Comedy, and they were all really interesting!
Who would I recommend The Way Of Integrity summary to?
The 47-year-old manager who feels like their life is running on autopilot, the 25-year-old that has everything they thought they ever wanted but isn’t sure why they’re still unhappy, and anyone who wants to discover themselves and live true to that identity.