1-Sentence-Summary: Get Out Of Your Own Way guides you through the process of overcoming what’s holding you back from being your best self and reaching success you’ve never dreamed of by identifying how Dave Hollis came to realize his limiting beliefs and beat them.
Read in: 5 minutes
Favorite quote from the author:
You’d think that if you were the head of sales at The Walt Disney Company you’d be happier than anybody around. How hard would it be to stay on top of the world getting to work on movies like Frozen, Inside Out, and everything from Marvel?
This was the case for Dave Hollis. He was really good at what he did for Disney, but instead of having fulfillment, he was miserable. Against everyone’s assumptions about what he should do, Dave quit and began working for his wife’s business.
The lessons he learned along the way about breaking out of a rut are all within his new book Get Out of Your Own Way: A Skeptic’s Guide to Growth and Fulfillment. You’ll discover, by following along with his journey, the hidden beliefs you have that are holding you back, how to beat them, and how wonderful life can be once you do.
Here are the 3 most motivational lessons that I got out of this book:
- The people who grow the most know that failure is normal.
- If you want your life to improve, stop avoiding pain.
- You’re following hidden rules called limiting beliefs that are holding you back from reaching your full potential, but you can break them.
Let’s get right to it and find out how to stop getting in our own way on the road to success!
Lesson 1: Failure is normal and acceptable for the people who grow the most.
One day, Dave’s son Jackson decided that he’d like to run for class president. Knowing this was a learning opportunity no matter how Jackson did, Dave encouraged him to do it.
He knew because he’d failed twice at the same dream. And when Jackson failed, Dave could teach him that losing doesn’t make someone a failure and that it won’t kill you.
This was all happening while Dave was having his work crisis. He’d gotten to a point where he could put in little effort and see a lot of success. Which meant he wasn’t very fulfilled. But anything new scared him because of the chances it could fail.
The problem was that dave had a fixed mindset, as Carol Dweck explains in her book Mindset. He’d been stuck believing that he couldn’t change his skills or talents.
Contrast this with the growth mindset that he later developed. People with this attitude toward life know that they can change anything about themselves they want. Having this outlook makes them more likely to take chances because they know that failure isn’t permanent.
Dweck’s book also taught Dave that he could choose his mindset. He realized that just like Jackson, failure wouldn’t kill him.
You can choose to have a growth mindset too. It is possible to break your social conditioning and uncover skills you never knew you had.
Lesson 2: Stop avoiding pain if you want to see your life improve.
Dave and his wife Rachel have three biological sons. Feeling their family was incomplete without a daughter, however, they decided to adopt in 2013.
It took three years, but eventually, they got the call about twin girls they could adopt. After saying yes, the couple was excited to finally have the girls they wanted.
Five weeks later, however, another call came in that devastated them. Although the biological mother didn’t want them, the father decided that he did. With tears and frustration, they gave up the little girls.
Dave felt determined to persist and make an adoption happen. The chance of going through the pain again was scary, but he understood how much they’d regret giving up. They had to keep going.
Things were looking good after a meeting with their adoption attorney one day when the couple was at lunch. After learning that the father didn’t want the Hollis’s to see the twins ever again, Rachel broke down and wanted to give up.
Miraculously, a man sitting near them overheard and let them know he was adopted. He told them that his parents failed multiple times before successfully adopting him. If it weren’t for their determination, his life would be very different.
This was just what the Hollis’s needed to realize that pushing through pain was important. Two months later, they adopted a little girl.
Lesson 3: Break yourself of your limiting beliefs if you want to reach your full potential.
Dave is now an avid runner. But he didn’t even begin running until his mid-thirties.
When he was young, people told him that tall people like him couldn’t run. And he believed them! But when a friend challenged him to a race, he got the drive he needed to beat these lies and become a runner.
This way of thinking is also known as a limiting belief, which is any lie you tell yourself that you think is true. When you believe in them, you put invisible fences around what you’re capable of.
But the truth is that you can choose to set your boundaries wherever you like.
When you get stuck in your stories you cheat yourself from amazing experiences you could have if you would let go of them. If you fail at a relationship, suddenly that means you’ll never have a good one. Watch for times you say “I’ll never” to find them.
I used to tell myself that money was evil and that I’ll never be rich for example. But once I got over this and all my other limiting beliefs around it, my life improved significantly. I soon doubled my income and started living my dreams.
You probably hold onto your limiting beliefs because it’s easier to stay inside of the comfort zone that they create for you. It’s scary to leave, but once you do, you’re stepping onto a path that leads to a life that you love.
Get Out Of Your Own Way Review
What an excellent book! Get Out Of Your Own Way is perfect for all the studying I’m doing right now on limiting beliefs and how to beat them. It’s inspired me to get over myself and my stories so that I can reach my dreams and I’m confident that it will do the same for you!
Who would I recommend the Get Out Of Your Own Way summary to?
The 47-year-old who has been working in their job for a while and never paused to ask themselves whether they like it or not, the 22-year-old with low self-esteem that always makes excuses but doesn’t realize it, and anyone that wants to be their best self.