Unfu*k Yourself Summary

1-Sentence-Summary: Unfu*k Yourself offers practical advice on how to get out of your self-destructive thoughts and take charge of your life by learning how to control them and motivate yourself to take more responsibility for your life than you ever have before.

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Unf*ck Yourself summary

We all have our unique paths in life. The principles behind what is “correct’’ we’ve been taught since birth. These work great for those who are risk-averse. But what if you are not that person? Will these truths do more bad than good?

Outgrowing your mindset and breaking the rules that you were taught to follow while growing up is one of the most challenging things you can do in your life. However, it can also prove to be the most rewarding thing you will do. 

Our subconscious is responsible for 95% of our thoughts and implicitly, of what we do every day. Put it this way: controlling your subconscious allows you to shape a big part of what is going on throughout your day and train your mind to attract specific things.

Therefore, we need to learn how to train it for our benefit and break the cycle of repetitive thoughts and actions that keep us still and interfere with our growth. For that, Unfu*k Yourself teaches us how to create a comprehensive, practical plan to follow and adopt a winning mentality.

Here are my three favorite lessons from the book:

  1. Embrace uncertainty and get comfortable with getting out of your usual environment.
  2. Enjoy your life’s journey instead of postponing your happiness until you reach your goals.
  3. Taking charge of your life implies being responsible for your actions and not blaming other people for your mistakes.

Let’s see what it takes to get unfu*ked!

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Lesson 1: Learn to chase the impossible and seize opportunities outside your comfort zone.

If you want to live the life you have imagined, it is imperative that you start planning it and figure out a strategy to achieve it. Defining goals is one of the most important parts of the planning process, as it sets the foundation for your actions. Therefore, prioritize it, instead of postponing it. 

Be specific when it comes to your objectives and create attainable, step-by-step plans to achieve them. However, in the process of planning, it is important to let your expectations go and truly think about what you want out of your life. Falling into the trap of your own mind is a common mistake in this process.

Dream the impossible, then achieve it. Don’t plan someone else’s life, picturing a house, a child, and a perfect job, if that’s not what you wish for. Don’t buy into certain secure outcomes and get stuck in a job or position that you loathe. Instead, chase the unreal and picture what exactly you want out of your life.

The author suggests that chasing uncertainty is what will add more magic to your life. You cannot predict your life, so instead of trying to do so, just embrace whatever comes at you and learn to juggle with it. It may surprise you, but when you adopt this mindset, inexplicable things will start happening to you and change your life.

Lesson 2: Enjoy the journey as much as you enjoy achieving your goals.

Gary plays on the idea that life is uncertain and that you can’t fight it. Frankly, there’s not much to argue about with this fact. Therefore, our plans will not always fit into the picture-perfect lines we’ve drawn for ourselves. When this happens, the best thing you can do is acknowledge and rebalance. 

Many people postpone their happiness until they reach their goals. This is unhealthy, as variables change in time and what sounded like a good plan and a successful accomplishment before may change in time. Learn to enjoy the journey and find happiness in the little things that make it unique.

Planning and setting objectives is a healthy approach to your life and it can prove to be very rewarding in time. However, clinging to those expectations and linking your sense of purpose to them is not. Expectations can distract us from more important things, such as opportunities to seize or a more positive outcome.

Failures often awaken certain self-destructive emotions. Bishop suggests that whenever we fail or something doesn’t go as planned, we have to simply accept it and move on. Moreover, we have to find happiness in the journey we had and find peace in the idea that the final destination is not the most important part.

Lesson 3: Don’t blame others for your failures and learn to take responsibility for your decisions.

When failures do occur, it can be difficult to acknowledge that we are the ones to blame for our actions and that most of the time, the way a situation ends up is entirely up to us.

Still, accepting failure as a natural part of our life can be difficult. However, realizing that we made a mistake can prove to be quite rewarding in the long run. Why? Because as we fail, we learn, but only if we fail productively. 

So how can one do so? Well, as you derail from your well-established goals, you should stop and analyze what caused you misfortune in your undertakings. Most often than not, you’ll find that it is something that could’ve been done better by you. Learn from that. 

Always keep a foot in the past, and one in the future. As you go through life, failure will follow, and that’s just a fact. Respond to it by taking full responsibility and remembering it the next time you find yourself in a similar situation, in order to get a better outcome.

Unfu*k Yourself Review

Unfu*k Yourself reveals practical tips on how to own your life and live more meaningfully by getting out of your head and accepting failure, uncomfortable situations, and change. This book can help you develop a deeper sense of understanding for life and change your mindset for the better. By exploring a different approach to life, including more exposure to risk and challenging situations, its readers can significantly change their life for the better.

Who would I recommend the Unfu*k Yourself summary to?

The 23-year-old student who is looking to get more practical advice on how to live a better life, the 30-year-old introvert who wants to turn their life around, or the 45-year-old worker who suffers from burnout.

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